Monthly Archives: April 2011

The Spring Preview Issue Is Alive…and Awesome

Click On The Cover To See The Issue

It has been a veritable log flume around SCOF headquarters for the past week.  The lows have been truly low and the highs, well the highs have been better than huffing a bag full of glue out of a meth heads belly button. After switching providers at the eleventh hour and fifty ninth minute we have had a week to tweak everything…like a purple nurple on a fourth grader with glasses. We are proud to announce that the issue is 100% complete (unless someone finds a typo…which please don’t tell us about if you do…Steve might not make it through another issue upload), and all the links, video and mobile platform work.

So a little housekeeping is in order.  Ryan Dunne’s video Bluelines and Banjos video opens in a separate window from the issue, and be warned it takes a minute to load. We wanted to present it in the highest definition possible and figured a little bit of load time was worth seeing those wild fish in full High Definition. If you’re severely ADD and the Ritalin just isn’t helping, hit the video and browse the rest of the mag while it loads…it’s worth it. We have linked everything in the issue we could think of so when you are flipping through don’t forget to give every page a thorough cavity search and the links will light up when you hover over them. Last but not least we have made SCOF mobile. You can down load the issue through our website on the iPhone and iPad. We have optimized the issue to be viewed in iBook so you can still watch the video and explore all the different links. If you are on the Droid operating system download the Issuu app and search Southern Culture On The Fly.

Steve and I would like to thank all of our great contributors (click their bios in the mag to check out their professional sites) for giving up their time and skills helping us make a magazine that we hope Southern Fly Fisherman can be proud of. We would also like to thank Curtis Wright Outfitters and Hog Island Boatworks for going out on a very long, thin limb and becoming our first paying advertisers. Steve and I put a lot of ourselves, and more than a little bit of our sanity into this project, and we are pretty confident that the magazine is only going to get better as we move forward (Fall Issue drops October 2011 with more features and departments). So, if you have suggestions, criticisms, story ideas or any other feedback please share, but just remember…I cry a lot…for no reason…sometimes for days at a time.

-Dave

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The Lost Art of Listening

I am what you call a selective listener.  I can recite, in a Rain Man like manner, what I have heard from multiple guides as to what is going down on various pieces of water in the area.  I can tell you the life cycle stage of the bugs seen, as well as the time (plus or minus twenty minutes) when they were reported to be doing their thing. On the other hand if you tell me ten times that I have a wedding to attend three weeks from now I will still find it appalling that you expect me to go to a wedding and give up a day of fishing with no prior warning. It’s not that I find what you are telling me is unimportant, but my mind has what I like to call a trivial filter. If my trivial alarm starts blaring, it is pretty likely that I am not going to make it much past the opening of the face hole.  With the Spring Preview Issue going live on Wednesday at midnight, my trivial alarm has gotten close to all encompassing. So if you see me around the next few days, at the shop or on the water, I would recommend sending me an email because the likelihood of me retaining anything important you happen to tell me has hit an all time low…now what was it we were talking about?

Maybe I’ll make it…maybe I won’t,

Dave

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Hell Week For SCOF…Let The Paddling Begin

I know we haven’t posted in a bit but that is mainly due to the fact that Steve and I have been locked in a room for the past week, with nothing more than two cases of PBR, a Costco pack of Snicker bars, and a laptop, putting the final pieces of the puzzle together for the Spring Preview issue. Who knew making a magazine was a bunch of work? Those dudes at the Drake make it seem like they poop well written essays for breakfast and piss out some amazing photography for lunch, as a matter of fact. Well I am happy to announce that next Thursday the preview issue will be live and soon after that I plan on going off the grid for some much-needed fishing time as well as a long overdue colonic.  So while I am stuck in the shop today I decide why not bring SCOF readers some hilarity, while at the same time giving everyone a little window into my world. This video has been out there a while yet still has not been picked up by the Discovery Channel, can’t figure that one out. Enjoy…me.

- Dave

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Who Turned The Lights Out In The Park…And Why Does It Smell Like Crap?

There is something rotten in the Smokies. It has not been a good week to be a Southern national park and the outlook for next week ain’t so bright either. A sewage treatment plant wall collapsed tragically killing workers at the plant, and sending 850,000 gallons of sewage (minus the solids) into the Little Pigeon River, near Gatlinburg.  If this wasn’t bad enough it looks like the park is going to be shutdown next week as a result of the impending overall government shutdown. Lucky for the folks who live in those Appalachian towns that rely on revenue from park visitors, it looks like everyone will be able to take a nice unpaid two-week vacation right as the season is really starting to crank up. Can you sense the sarcasm here folks?

Click Here For Sewage Story
Click Here For Park Closure Story

- Dave

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An Open Letter To The Guy Who Defiled The Restroom Last Saturday

Dear Sir,

What is the matter with you? I mean really, have we as a society devolved to the point where it has become acceptable to leave that kind of mess in a restaurant bathroom. I am not a prideful man but I have to work at a horrible job for very little money, I haven’t been able to get the smell of wings out of my nostrils for weeks now, and I do all of this because I love to fish and not much else. You sir apparently like to crap yourself in restaurants and rely on the servers to clean up your mess. I have often asked myself if pursuing my passion is worth all the crap (both literal and figurative) that I have to put up with. I mean when you work in an office I am pretty sure no one asks you to dispose of their recently soiled underwear (I might be wrong on that one it’s been a while since I worked in an office). So last Saturday you really forced me to examine what I am doing with my life…yesterday I went fishing.  I would like to thank you for really bringing my life into focus with your unfortunate poopy accident. I can finally call myself a hardcore fisherman, because if I am willing to pick up another man’s stained drawers to keep fishing I am pretty sure that qualifies me.

If I ever find out who you are, I will punch you directly in the throat,

Dave “Super Hardcore” Grossman

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